RollOn, RollOver, and AlphaNail: Onnit’s Embarrassing Origins

RollOn, RollOver, and AlphaNail: Onnit's Embarrassing OriginsIn honor of Memorial Day, let’s take a look back at a few Onnit products that are no more.

If your knowledge of Onnit is limited only to what the company has been introducing over the past year or so, you may not have heard about these three products that are no longer offered by Onnit. These include RollOn, RollOver, and AlphaNail.

First, let’s explore RollOn and RollOver. I had heard about these products before but forgot about them until Joe talked about them on a podcast recently. What is now known as New Mood began as RollOn and RollOver, and both were marketed as supplements to take before and after taking MDMA, more commonly known as Molly or ecstasy.

Onnit RollOn and RollOver

The idea behind RollOn and RollOver is that your body and brain is going to go through some shit when you take Molly. Joe has said before that after taking Molly, he wasn’t the same person the next day. He was unable to concentrate, had difficulty reading, and his brain felt like a dry sponge. There’s also the toll the body takes after taking ecstasy, since users are likely to stay up all night at a party or “rave” dancing.

RollOn was designed to be taken before any drugs to prepare you for a long night of partying, providing you with a cocktail of vitamins and nutrients to ensure you don’t crash throughout the night. RollOver is taken after the partying to restore serotonin, ease your cramped muscles, and to relax your mind.

It’s not hard to see why Onnit morphed these two products into new formulas. I can’t imagine that any legitimate company would want to be known for selling products designed to be taken before and after consuming illegal drugs.

If RollOn and RollOver seem unbelievable, you haven’t seen nothing yet.

Back in 2011, Onnit introduced its first alpha-branded product: AlphaNail. No, it’s not a supplement designed to give you strong finger and toenails. It’s literally nail polish designed for men.

Onnit AlphaNail

Aubrey Marcus (or Chris as he was known back then, before his life-changing drug trip that led him to change his name to Aubrey) said that Alpha Nails would make “men’s nails strong” while allowing them to maintain their “alpha male swagger” and help the male become more noticeable. We all know that when a male is noticed more, the more he “humps”. That last part is Onnit’s marketing jargon, not mine. If that wasn’t enough, it was also suggested that the wearer “”paint one hand matte black, and one hand metallic black and ask a girl which she likes better.” Why you ask? “Bang. You’re in the GAME.”

If it all sounds pretty ridiculous, it is. Just do a Google search for “alphanail” and you’ll see some of the marketing used for the product, which includes half-naked women and muscular, tattooed MMA fighters. It’s hard to believe that Aubrey would release something so bizarre, but all companies have to start somewhere.

I realize this post is totally cringe worthy, but it’s an entertaining look back at how far Aubrey and Onnit have come as a company. I’m glad he decided to ditch the marketing that targets douchebag alpha males who are into drugs/partying/humping and focus on developing products that truly help people of all ages and sexes live healthier better lives.

The Ultimate Steel Mace Workout

The Ultimate Steel Mace WorkoutThe problem with owning exercise equipment like a steel mace  or a steel club is that workouts are a little hard to come by. You can’t exactly stream this stuff over Netflix, so you’re left with ordering obscure DVDs over the internet that may or may not be what you’re looking for. Because these DVDs don’t sell high volumes, the cost of them is often higher than you’d pay for something like The Avengers on Blu-Ray. Of course there’s always home-made YouTube clips of guys swinging around steel clubs, but the production leaves a lot to be desired.

What Onnit has done is taken the next logical step in its fitness empire. The company is not only bringing steel maces and steel clubs to the masses, its now also providing the workout routines so you can make the most of this equipment. A smart move, I thought, but what I like even more is the delivery method. Gone are the days of physical media, either in the form of a video tape or disc. No longer will you have to wait days or weeks for your video to arrive in the mail. Onnit is now offering digital downloads, the first of which is The Ultimate Steel Mace Workout.

The advantages to a digital download are plentiful. Pay for it, download it, and begin your workout within a few minutes. No waiting by the mailbox for your video to be delivered. Going on the road? Copy the video file to your laptop, tablet, or even your smart phone to take it on the road with you. Back it up to a USB stick and ensure you never accidentally delete or lose it. The workout can be with you wherever you go–indoors or out–and you won’t have to be tied to your television.

But enough about the format, let’s talk about The Ultimate Steel Mace Workout itself, which is hosted by Mr. Onnit, Aubrey Marcus. Aubrey has designed a workout that’s suitable for any skill level. Obviously, newbies will want to start with the lowest weight possible, and savages can go for the heaviest if they can handle it. Aubrey then puts you through an intense full body workout that pushes your cardio and strength to its limits, and then brings you back down with a yoga cooldown.

The video also features “extras” or bonus features in the form of videos that outline the history of the mace and techniques you’ll use in the video to ensure proper form. Priced at only $5, it’s cheap enough to take a gamble on if you own and use steel clubs. Don’t have steel clubs? Onnit is selling them right now at a 10% discount.

I haven’t yet purchased The Ultimate Steel Mace workout, but I’m definitely intrigued, and with Onnit’s track record, I’m sure it’s a quality product.

Onnit Zombie Bells Now Available!

Onnit Zombie Bells Now Available!Oh shit! Everyone has been waiting weeks for these, and now the Onnit Zombie Bells are finally available. I say “they” because there is actually more than one Zombie Bell. In fact, there are four Zombie Bells in total, varying in size of course, and they’re all available right now. Halloween has always been my favorite holiday, and now it’s that much cooler.

Let’s get right into it and take a look at each of these Zombie Bells working from smallest to largest, from the right side of the image below over to the left:

Onnit Zombie Bells Kettlebells

Brain Goblin Zombie Bell
This is the smallest of the Zombie Bells, weighing in at a half pood, which is 18 lbs. He has rotting flesh, exposed teeth, and angry lifeless eyes that stare back at you as you swing him around.

Staple Head Zombie Bell
The Staple Head Zombie Bell weighs a full pood or 36 lbs. He’s missing his nose and his lips and his scalp has been ripped off revealing his skull underneath, what’s remaining of his flesh is held to his head with staples.

Ghostface Thrilla Zombie Bell
The Ghostface Thrilla Zombie bell weighs 1.5 poods or 54 lbs. This guy has an angry sneer, he’s missing a nose and his lips, and like the others, his flesh is rotting off his face.

The Mega Death Zombie Bell
The most badass of all the Zombie Bells is the two pood 72 lb. Mega Death Zombie Bell. This guy too is a little angry that he’s a member of the living dead. Someone’s gotten to him and managed to clamp his mouth shut. While you won’t have to worry about him biting a chunk out of your body, he’s definitely the most intimidating of the Zombie Bells to workout with.

All four of these Onnit Zombie Bell kettlebells are crafted with chip-resistant iron, so if you want to workout with them, they’ll stand the test of time. If you want to display them as works of art, they’re perfect for that too. They’ll also make incredible weapons should a zombie apocalypse take over the world at any time.

As I said, these Zombie Bells can be displayed as works of art, and that’s not hyperbole. They are beautifully crafted with incredible attention to detail. Each Zombie Bell is made to human skull proportions. They’re balanced perfectly as well, so if you do want to work out with them, you can, and they’re feel just like a traditional kettlebell will. But these are infinitely more badass.

Like the Primal Bells, the Zombie Bells are available for a limited time only. If you want to buy one, don’t wait. If you think you might want the whole collection, scoop them all up. If you choose either of the two biggest Zombie Bells in your order, you’ll also get a pair of Onnit Zombie Bell wrist guards to sweeten the deal.

Happy Halloween!

The Howler Primal Bell from Onnit Now Available!

The Howler Primal Bell from Onnit Now Available!I know everyone is all excited about the new Onnit Zombie Bells, and I am too. I say “bells” plural because there is more than one. Aubrey Marcus said on a recent episode of The Joe Rogan Experience podcast that there will actually be four Zombie Bells kettlebells in various sizes. So, it looks like this will be an ongoing thing for Onnit: kettlebells in four different varieties each with a different look. (Update 10/28/13: Zombie Bells now available!)

The first of these stylized kettlebells was of course the series of Primal Bells. Three were first released; the chimp, the ape, and then the orangutan, and yesterday the fourth in the series was released. This one is called The Howler!

The Howler is the smallest of the Primal Bells, weighing just a half pood, or 18 lbs. in terms we can all understand. This one looks like a screaming chimp with his fangs exposed. While it’s the smallest of the Primal Bells, it’s definitely the most menacing looking!

Like all the Primal Bells, The Howler is crafted from chip-resistant iron that will stand up to regular wear and tear and rusting as well. You can use this like a savage and keep it on display in the meantime. It’s a work of art that’s perfectly balanced, meaning you can use it like a traditional kettlebell and it won’t feel any different. It just looks infinitely more badass than a cannonball with a handle attached to it.

Check out the whole line of Primal Bells at Onnit, and if you haven’t bought any yet, you can buy all four in a bundle at a significant savings. You can save 15% total when you purchase all at once! But make sure you save up a bit of money for the Zombie Bells which are now available, just in time for Halloween!.

Check out this 360 degree view of the new Howler:

Onnit The Howler Primal Bell Kettlebell 360 Degree View

Adding Salt to Drinking Water

Adding Salt to Drinking WaterRecently Aubrey Marcus (the brains behind Onnit Labs) was on Joe Rogan’s podcast (Joe is a co-owner of Onnit) and he was talking about a wide range of topics relating to the body and health when he spoke about drinking water. Aubrey mentioned that he adds a bit of Onnit Pink Himalayan Salt to his water before drinking it. Normally we’re looking to filter things out of our water, so why was he adding salt back into it?

It turns out that the filtering process strips out all the bad stuff that we don’t want in our bodies, but it also eliminates some of the good stuff as well. Minerals that our bodies need to function efficiently can be found in water, but filtering the water takes out these minerals. Adding a bit of salt to your drinking water allows you to drink clean water with the minerals your body needs as well.

Regular table salt isn’t necessarily what you should be reaching for when you’re looking to salt your drinking water. Instead, look for salt that’s naturally acquired, like the Pink Himalayan Salt that Aubrey uses. This salt is mined from salt deposits that are about 250 million years old, created long before we began to pollute the earth with heavy metals, pesticides, etc. The pink color is visual evidence that the salt is packed with 84 trace minerals and electrolytes that our bodies use and crave.

When adding Himalayan salt to drinking water, you’ll want to measure out about a teaspoon or a teaspoon and a half. You may also choose to simply swallow the salt and then follow it up with a glass of water. Ingesting water salted with Himalayan salt can have a profound effect on the body, such as boosting your energy, balancing your blood sugar, and curbing your appetite as well.

Onnit has for sale 12 oz. glass jars (complete with spoon) of Pink Himalayan Salt for sale, along with 2 lb. refill bags, and boxes of single-serving packets of salt, which are perfect for carrying with you. Add a packet of salt to a bottle of drinking water to get your minerals on the go.